DEVELOP A HABIT OF HAPPINESS BY HON. COMFORT TIMI ESHOFONIE

DEVELOP A HABIT OF HAPPINESS

By Hon. Comfort Timi Eshofonie

Many people don’t realize that much of the manner in which we approach Life - Our attitudes and our demeanor - is Learned behavior. These habits have formed by repetition throughout the years. If we’ve spent years focusing on what’s wrong, these negative patterns are going to keep us from enjoying our lives.

We acquired many of our habits from our parents or from people who were around us as we grew up. Studies tell us that generally negative parents raise negative children.

If your parents focused more on what was wrong, living stressed out, uptight or discouraged, there’s a good possibility that you have developed some of those negative mind-sets.

The Bible says, “Rejoice in the Lord always.” One translation simply says; ”Be happy all the time .” That means, no matter what comes our way, we can have smiles on our faces. We should get up each morning excited about the day. Even if we are facing difficulties or negative circumstances, we need to learn to keep a positive outlook.

Happiness does not depend on your circumstance; it depends on your will. It is a choice that you make. I’ve seen people go through some awful, unfortunate situations, yet at the time, you would never know they were having a problem. They had a smile on their face and a good report on their lips. In spite of their dire dilemma, they remained positive, upbeat and energetic.

Other people in similar circumstances - and some in far less severe situations insist on wallowing in despair. They’re down, depressed, discouraged and worried. What makes the difference?

It’s all in how they’ve trained their minds. One person has developed a habit of happiness. He is hopeful and trusting, believing for the best. The other person has trained his mind to see the negative. He’s worried, frustrated and constantly complaining.

If you are going to develop a habit of happiness, you must learn to relax and go with the flow, instead of getting frustrated. You have to believe that God is in control, and that means you have no need to be stressed out and worried. Moreover, you have to be grateful for what you have rather than complaining about what you don’t have. A habit of happiness boils down to staying on the positive side of life.

Each day is full of surprises and inconveniences, so you must accept the fact that not everything is going to always go your way. Your plan may not work out as you have scheduled them. When that happens, make a willful decision that you are not going to let the circumstance upset you. Don’t allow stress and anxiety steal your joy. Instead, be adaptable and adjustable and seek to make the best of a bad situation.

I’ve learned that I don’t need to have my way to be happy. If we have this kind of attitude, minor irritations or inconveniences that may have stressed you out will cease to be a source of frustration. You don’t have to live all uptight.

Quit allowing somebody else’s idiosyncrasy to get the best of you. Life is too short to live it stressed out. Besides, prolonged stress can damage your health and significantly shorten your life.

- Take an honest look at your life. Are you as happy as you know you should be deep down inside? Do you get up each day excited about your career, enjoying your family? If not, what is stealing your joy and causing you to get upset? Why are you worried? Identify what it is. Take inventory and then take a step further.

Begin retraining your mind in those particular areas.

Friends, there’s too much sadness in our world today. Many people are even physically sick because they are living so stressed out, uptight and worried. Granted, depression may be caused by a chemical imbalance, but too many people are dragging around defeated and depressed because they habitually focus on the negative. They focus on their problems, on what’s wrong, rather than what’s right, or what they’ve lost or can’t do, rather than what they can do with what they have left.

- Change your focus. You can have a tiny problem but if you stay too focused on it, it will seem to get bigger and bigger. Don’t magnify your problem, magnify your God.

- I don’t mean you feel on top of the world all the time. That’s not realistic. I am talking about being content. In fact, one definition of Joy is “calm delight”. That means you are at peace, you have a smile on your face, you are excited about your future. Sure, you may have some problems. We all have obstacles to overcome. But we know God is in control. We know He has us in the palm of his Hand.

- Following the devastation in the United States by Hurricane Katrina, about 17 years ago, I was watching a special NEWS program over CNN as the reporters were interviewing people in New Orleans who had gone through the hurricane. Person after person told his or her story. They were extremely negative and bitter, blaming other people, blaming the government, blaming God. One young woman stepped up to the microphone and I could tell that she had a different attitude. She had a big smile and her face almost seemed to glow. The reporter asked her somewhat sarcastically, “Okay, tell us your story, what’s wrong?” “Nothing’s wrong”, the woman said. “I’m not here to complain. I am simply here to thank God that I’m still alive and I have my health. I thank God that my husband and children are okay.’’

The reporter was taken aback. Everyone else has been complaining about not having any electricity or water. The reporter probed further, “Well, what about your power? Do you have any electricity?”. The woman said “No, I don’t have electricity. Not only do I not have any electricity, I also do not have a home. It was swept away in the flood” Then she smiled and said, “I’ll tell you what I do have. I have my hope, I have my Joy, I have peace. I know God is on my side.”

- That woman chose to take a heartrending, negative, unfortunate situation, and she chose to turn it around. She refused to allow negative circumstances to steal her joy. She was saying in effect; “I know God is still in control of my life. I know He’s going to take care of my husband, my children and I.’’

- Train your mind to see the good. Everybody around you may be complaining, but you can find the good in every situation. If you do this, you can indeed be happy at all times.

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